ISSB Memories as a Candidate for BAF Engineering Core

Board: 1763, Branch ; GRD -Br-67, Chest No :66, Result : Rejected or Not Selected

Yuh that's how I m starting to write this note. Because being rejected from ISSB (Inter Services Selection Board) I felt so dejected that I don't remember when for the last time I felt so in my matured age. Handing me the "Red Card" like to all others of my group, I was briefed that I lag somewhere in mental stability. The three and a half days tenure at ISSB as a candidate for Bangladesh Air Force Engineering Core at this age was one of the great experiences of my almost 30 years old life. On the third day, after finishing all the field tests when we, candidates of our group were individually asked to give our expressions on ISSB, I said,"This was the deepest call to bring out the 'real me' inside me". Indeed that was a powerful mirror that gives the overall view of a person, his/her maturity , personality, values, physical condition , mental condition, perception, intelligence, aptitude, command, energy , commitment etc etc. All the expert judges of character working there for years are quite professional. The DP who was handing me the card said that this is the only organization in Bangladesh that's still surviving as a world class institute finding out top quality and potential defense officers. So they don’t compromise with the quality at all. What it means, I might have got some sectors to work on. May Allah help me.

If u havn't gone out to observe the colors, don't worry. Cuzz Pohela Boishakh knocks your door at night..!!

Staying home all the day I can't deny that I was a bit upset on myself. Watching the colorful rallies on the TV where all the cheerful people were enjoying the occasion taking a walk out in this scorching hit with friends and families, I gradually started to find myself a looser. But, by the Rahmat of Allah when the wind got stronger with a rapid drop of temperature at around half past 10 at night, I realized that it has arrived. Suddenly, I found a strong urge inside me to go out and to feel the cool (..and dusty...) wind in my hair before it starts to rain . I love to do that at the start of the first summer storm of the season every year from my childhood. So I did it. Went out chanting like a child.."..Boy..!!!.I like it...!!!" Cuzz I was happy I haven't missed the whole party...at least not all...

There is a new showroom of a renowned bakery of the city just at a minute's walk from my residence. Last night I bought some donuts from there and I thought why not tonight..!!!?.

Well, not before meeting Bappy(a boy of 25/26 , my next door neighbor )whom I offered one as a new year greeting. Hope he likes donuts...

You know.... the mind got refreshed when it started raining and the atmosphere became cooler..Maaan... this was pleasure....!! The agony for missing all the day items suddenly got washed away....

I was back home by then....and was feeling good that starting with a tension of thesis works I have ended the day with a refreshing touch of nature for 5 to 10 minutes... Shokor Alhamdulillah...

Barandai Sun-Shed ta dheu tin er. Shetar upor bristir shobdo shune mone hochchilo....nanur khate shue achi.....(To be continued..)

Bangladesh Cricket Team and the Arithmatic of the Monkey and the Oily Bamboo

I first felt the connection between Bangladesh Cricket Team's Performance and the nation's spirit way back in ICC trophy,1993 where Minhazul Abedin lead Bangladesh team lost the chance to play in ....(to be continued....)

One can now easily say that the confidence of the team that defeated New Zealand 4 to nil last November ,is shrunk to a hopeless state. When a test team skipper says that a score of 270 cannot be chased because of a slow wicket then I wonder if any of the journalists ever dared to ask whether he ever tried to chase it down.....(to be continued....)

eta anekta "Banor ar Toilakto Bash" er anker moto . Tin hath uthley , abar dui hath neme ashe ....But what ever be the reason behind such tragedy Bangladeshi cricket fans must be thinking where is the end of this painful torture.............!!!(to be continued....)

February 25 Takes New Color in The Calendar

One of my school friend wrote on his Facebook status :
Dukkhe koilja haadi jar,tiger tora kearlli :((( Ashra abaro amader fool korilo :((((( Allah amne konai ???

No wonder that was after the first innings....

And then a comment to the status was fired about 3 and a half hours later. That was from another of my school friend :

Allah Ijjot basai disey.................

Haada Koilza Zora Lagi geseyyyyyyyy....

Shabbash Bagher Baichha......... Killai Majhey Mjahey Bilar Chha oi jass??

So you see at the two years anniversary of the brutal BDR mutiny what claimed so many lives, I believe this black day of agony, woe, distress, disgrace and pain has got a new colors of confidence, nerve, courage, character and joy on the calendar of this year for the nation.

The best way to the solutions of all problems

The fact is, I can't deny any of those accusations or comments of my family members as I've failed to control my temper in quite a few occasions. My carelessness in tuning or controlling the attitude towards family members already have cost me some unexpected occurrences outside. I really need to do something to prevent it before it costs me a permanent change in my behavior. That obviously would be a disaster.(to be continued….)

Well, things are lot better now , by the Rahmat of Allah, Alhamdulillah. Actually, some facts like

not being involved in any profession at this age,

not giving the required effort to finish the thesis work of my post-grad studies,

pushing the future towards uncertainty with a sort of carelessness that's not at all acceptable for a grown up person like me

and some irregularities in my daily life could have been the reasons behind such uncontrolled behaviors.

All on a sudden I notice that there are some unchecked irregularities in saying my five times prayers. Maintaining the proper waqt(time) must be ensured there. The basic practice what The Creator made Faraz(Mandatory) for a Muslim can obviously be the key to solve all sorts of problems if it is done properly.

So , everybody pleas pray for me.. that I can take care of my five times prayers (Salat) by the Rahmat of Allah

Phonei Dilam Bieyer Prostab.....!!!

"..মিম ভাই, আপনি আমাকে পছন্দ করতেন...!!?..আমি আর আপনি তো এক্কেবারে অপোজিট ক্যারেক্টার এর...."

 Well, not quite an incorrect judgment by my ex-colleague. I remember I was a bit relaxed as Farzana and a few other engineers joined the X-Net Express Broadband ISP's tech-support (probably in March, 2008) after 4 months passed with just Sani vai and me on TS duties under the supervisor Rony vai. And then all of the new engineers including this one, my next-desk colleague Farzana Rahman, have dealt my short-tempered and a bit egoistic attitude. But, I don't know why I've always felt that I'm getting a silent admiration from this lady for my commitment to duty. Quite a few times she has seen me getting crossed with colleagues or talking loud in the office or over the phone. Despite such ruthless or not so decent attitude she as a good and wise colleague, tried to give me some advise to choose the right track for career development. I remember she told me that I should go for field operation jobs rather than switching into Software Development.
Well,I can place many good reasons for what I've done last December. But the fact is eventually I managed to have done it within the valid time period!! Someday Insha Allah I can feel good thinking that I atleast had made a proposal to this lady may be before it was too late by the Rahmat of Allah.

তার এই কথা শুনে আমি কি হাসবো না কাঁদবো বুঝতে পারছিলাম না. এতদিন পর এত কষ্ট করে ফোন নম্বর জোগাড় করে, প্রথম কলএ বলতে না পেরে দ্বিতীয় কল এর অনুমতি পেলাম, শুধু এজন্যেই তাকে ধন্যবাদ !! উনি এখনো অবিবাহিত আছেন কিনা, সেটা জানতেও তো কত কাঠ খড় পোড়াতে হলো. প্রথম কলে যখন জিজ্ঞেস করলাম, 

"...আপনি এখন কোথায় আছেন...?" 

.. জবাব এলো : "..আমি তো বাসায়, কেন..😒..?" 

আমার পেটের কথাটা মুখের কাছে এসে বেরোই বেরোই করেও আর বেরোলোনা!! তা উনার ওই "কেন" শুনেই এক ঢোকে আবার পেটে চলে গেলো ...😖...!! ....আর মুখ দিয়ে যা বেরহলো তা  মুখের কথাই :

- "..না, মানে...এখন জব কোথায় করছেন ..এই আর কি... ". 

- "আমি তো এক্স-নেট থেকে এ. দি . এন. এ এসেছি এক বছরের বেশি হয়ে গেছে",

    - "ওহ আচ্ছা , হ্যা রনি ভাই আমাকে বলেছিলো যে আপনি এ.দি.এন. এ গেছেন...etc...etc..etc.."

যাই হোক, এরপর কয়েকবার কল করে যখন দেখি উনি আর রিসিভই করছেন না তখন তো পেটের গণ্ডগোল মাথায় উঠে গেলো....  Er por dui jon ex-colleague er maddhomey amar arji pathanor chesta korlam. Tatey kono kaj to holoi na ulta aro false position e porey gelam. Sheshmesh SMS pathie anumoti peye , ak jon purusher jiboner shobchaitey shahoshi kaj gulor akta korey fellam. Shekhaney jodi shuntey hoi amar character shomporke unar ai dharona,Amar to hat pa churey kanna-kati korte hoi ar ki.... Aboshho dekha nei shona nei, dui-arai bosor porey evabey phoney ai kotha bolata keu hoito nehat fazlamo othoba "Practical Joke" hishebeo nite parey.

 
.....কিন্তু আমার আর কোনো উপায় থাকলেতো.... 😕..!!!

এত কাকুতি মিনতি করে টেক্সট পাঠানোর পর আরেকবার কল করার অনুমতি পাওয়া গেলো... এর পরেও আবার 'দেখা" করতে চাইলে তো আম আর ছালা দুটোই যাবে.... তাই পাঁচ থেকে ছয় মিনিটের ওই সেকেন্ড সেশন এ উত্তেজনার বশে কিছুটা উচ্চ্য স্বরে হড়বড় করে পেটের কথাটা বের ই করে দিলাম....

Jai hok, ai kaj ta korte holo, ato durey chole jabar por...!!! Kintu deritey holeo, kajta je korte perechi tar jonney akrokom shosti e lagchey. Kajta kotota mattured holo ta nie kotha abossho thekei jai. Ha, er poreyo abar opinion janar chesta korata thik holo kina bujte parchina. Jai hok shei bartho chestar por akhon porjonto ar knock korini abong thik korechi ar ojotha knock korbo o na. Atodin por ak jon je kichu bujte pereo amakey amar boktobbo uposthaponer shujog dilo, shetai ba kom ki!!?

Amar jotodur money porey akkebarei onnorokom ak manush chilen tini. Kotha barta, poshak ashak, achar babohar shob kichutei Masha-Allah tar akta marjito impression chilo. কাজ করতে গিয়ে কখনো কখনো হয়তো রাফ বিহেভও করে ফেলেছি, তার জন্যেই পরমুহূর্তেই আমার নিজেরও হয়তো খারাপ লাগতো...Kintu , tokhono akta kotha money hoto ja, akhon aro valo korey anuvob kori.. 

"...হাজারে একটা পাওয়া যায় এই রকম একটা মেয়ে..."

Tar proti roilo amar shuvo kamona ... May Allah bless her all the way.

Feel like taking the bat again ....

1.Thesis assignments 's been kicked off with a challenging look on my supervisor's eyes...
2. Professional life is getting more n more challenging as the career of my target has started to move away with time (As it seems for the time being but I'll take it as a local minima..).

3. Most importantly some uncontrolled behavior has started to appear again in my regular dealings. And that's really an awful feeling....
Now all these events have pushed me to call my very old version with what once I wanted to feel in a blank...

Yuh...!! I hope Insha Allah, I'm still that Mim from a bunch of Tapped Tennis Ball Cricketers of TTC campus , who feels that now is the time to take the bat in tight grip looking forward to play a crucial innings to save the game....

For a matter of fact it never really happened in my long struggle to get a permanent place in the TTC 11...

But people do change with time...and over the years I felt the bat in my grip for several times.(..and then for a strange reason I loose the grip or it looses away....as if I never had it!!)

Now let's see if I've made some improvement or not..

Pray for me...everybody....